Conversation With A Langaw

National Geographic Photographer - Hey, all you flies have been quite a nuisance ever since the world began, I think you guys finally met your match, the macro photographers. We are the fly shooters! We kill fly one a time.
Mr. Fly Superstar - Dude, we still out-number you a billion to one. How's that? You're not threatening our species at all.

National Geographic Photographer - Why do you think you are the favorite object of macro photographers in the Philippines?
Mr. Fly Superstar - We're everywhere. The bugs that comes next are the ants. But, we're far more prettier than the ants in macro shots. The spiders are pretty too but they are pretty hard to come by especially in the city. But us, you see us everywhere. Here, there and everywhere. You know all this shit.


National Geographic Photographer - Wow, words shit, flies and pretty have not been in the same paragraph before. Why you say, you are prettier than the ants?
Mr. Fly Superstar - Look at it yourself. You'll see tiny hairy me. You'll see our sparkling vibrant eyes. Our spiky sexy legs alone are a sight to behold. And did I mention, we got wings.


National Geographic Photographer - There are ants that have wings too.
Mr. Fly Superstar - Yeah, yeah, the queens? But hey, ants are boring, they only come in red/orange and black and the color is monotonous. Look at us, we're the sex goddess of bug shots in the Philippines. Macro photographers drool whenever they see us.


National Geographic Photographer - Yikes. Drooling for flies. You're a mother effing conceited insect. Considering you freakin carry million bacterias, it also makes me wonder, what's with you that we are still paying attention to you.
Mr. Fly Superstar - You got no choice man. You'll forever be taking picture of us, practicing macro shots, looking for that perfect macro fly shot.

National Geographic Photographer - Dammit, I agree. Speaking of which, may I shoot you now?
Mr. Fly Superstar - By all means.


National Geographic Photographer - But wait, I got another question for you... What do you think is the main difference between a macro shoot of an ant and a macro shoot of a fly?
Mr. Fly Superstar - Ahm, fly needs good studio lighting?


National Geographic Photographer - NOPE. It's easy to shoot ant, I can shoot 'em alive. But for the flies, it's a different story.


END OF INTERVIEW.

(HONEY WHERE'S THE BAYGON?!)